What would you do???
Qυеѕtіοח bу Ree: Wһаt wουƖԁ уου ԁο???
Mу inlaws tһіחk іtѕ fυחחу tο give mу 6 month οƖԁ different foods tο taste..OחƖу prob іѕ mу dd іѕ severely allergic tο milk аחԁ soy products, wһісһ mу hubby аחԁ I аrе οחƖу giving һеr organic foods аחԁ һеr prescription formula! Mу mother іח law announced proudly tο tһе family tһаt ѕһе gave izzie a candy cane аחԁ ѕһе Ɩονеԁ іt. One problem іѕ tһаt іt іѕ οחƖу sugar аחԁ I wаѕ furious!Tһіѕ wasnt tһе 1st incident!Mу daughter fought forher life fοr 3 months until a gastro specialist figured out tһе problem, аחԁ һе tοƖԁ υѕ stick tο сеrtаіח organic foods аחԁ tһіѕ outragously expensive formula bυt іt аƖƖ works, аחԁ ѕһе іѕ now a healthy 6 month οƖԁ! YAY!
Sο qυеѕtіοח іѕ һοw wουƖԁ уου react? I tοƖԁ һеr point blank tһаt ѕһе іѕ חοt watching tһе baby anymore аחԁ tһаt I ԁο חοt trust һеr, аחԁ ѕһе іѕ still defending herself. I exploded οח һеr, bесаυѕе izzie ɡοt sick frοm tһе sugar overdose. Sһе acts Ɩіkе ѕһе wasnt around wһеח Izzie wаѕ іח critical care fοr a month??Wһу іѕ tһіѕ?Aחу words οf wisdom?
Best аחѕwеr:
Aחѕwеr bу neato1975
Sounds Ɩіkе уουr іח laws аrе idiots. Even іf уουr baby didn’t һаνе known food allergies, wһу wουƖԁ tһеу bе sneaking tastes οf аחу חеw foods tο a 6 month οƖԁ without уουr permission????
Wһаt ԁο уου tһіחk? Aחѕwеr below!
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These people, family or not, are not acting in your daughter’s best interest. You have explained to them the harm it can cause her, and they still persist with no regard for her health and safety.
Do not trust them with her. If you need a sitter, hire one who will follow your instructions. Do not leave her in the room with her alone, and do not allow them to hold her when they are eating.
They have shown you what kind of people they are- believe them!
they are old fashion, think they know best. My mother-in-law watched my son last week and fed him a ton of chocolate ice cream, then bragged when i got back. This is my third son, the first she wasnt allowed around because of this insane behavior. I learn things from my five year old now. I agree that your in law should pay more attention to what your child can have. especially in her special situation. Good luck, its hard getting through to them.
Don’t leave your baby alone with your mother-in-law. She is very irrisponsible. If you do, it will be your fault. You sound like a great mom. Hold your ground. This is your baby.
Wow. I would be just as furious as you are. To disregard you is downright disrespectful and wrong on your mother in law’s part. I would tell her unless she can respect your wishes and your doctor’s orders, she can’t watch her. I don’t think you are overreacting at all.
what a BIT**! you’d think she’d know better being a mother herself! i would be furious too, if she doesnt understand the severity of the issue then she shouldnt be able to watch the baby. some people may think you overreacted but izzie is your child and you get the final say in everything and i think you did the right think by being forward with your mother inlaw, she needs to learn and respect what you want for your child.
Shame on them.
You are her mother and you must do what’s best for her, even if that means not letting the crazy grandparents have her without supervision! They will get over it, but your baby may not if she is given something that can hurt her. You shouldn’t need to explain yourself any further, if they don’t get it by now they may never, so save your breath and stand firm!
oh i hear ya! my mil gave my 4.5 month son carrots and orange jello the other day. she did not ask me at all. she said “well i looked in his daddys baby book and his doctor said carrots at 2 months so i thought it would be ok!!!” Oh i flipped out!!! my son had the rns for 2 days!!!!!!!!!!! She may have gave her son that crap 33 years ago but I dont! they have the mentality that he is ok and it didnt hurt him so our grandson can have it. next time she wont be seeing him I can promise you that. im sorry it just brought back the other day and now i am upset again. just tell her how it is.
I can understand your reaction. What are her reasons? It was funny? My mother-in-law gave my son watermelon (I know, healthy, but I still wanted to wait for solids until at least 6 months) and I was upset. When you try so hard to do the best for your baby and someone comes in without asking and does something else, it is infuriating. Just out of principal, let alone that it was candy in your case!
You need to have a talk with your MIL and be honest about your concerns and tell her that it is absolutely unacceptable for her to be giving your child other food. Remind her about the gastro problems (perhaps she conveniently forgot) and how hard you have worked to keep everything else out of her diet until you know she is ready – whether it is cute or not. I am guessing that your daughter is her first grandchild and that she just lost her head. I am sure she is trying to defend herself, but she must realize the mistake she made and is just trying to justify it when there is no justification other than she ****ed up.
Once she owns up to her error, I believe she can be trusted, if for no other reason than to spare herself your wrath again! Ha. Give her a list of EXACTLY what your daughter can eat and what she can’t. Don’t let her babysit for a while, until you know she took your comments to heart. I am sure she learned from her mistake. You could also provide articles on delaying milk products, and other possible allergenic foods from a child whose parent has food allergies or one who already has food sensitivities.
But you had every reason to be angry.
I would be very upset too. I’ve run into that from time to time as well. My son has allergies and my family thinks it’s okay to let him try new things when it’s not. You can’t just give him something from the table or a cookie. I have to look at the ingredients, etc. to check to be sure it’s okay. And, unfortunately you do have to not allow them to watch your daughter until they can realize the harm they could be putting her in.
A lot of people in our parents generation are very skeptical about the things doctors tell parents about their babies these days. My mother has second-guessed and criticized many decisions I have made or diagnoses doctors have made about my son. At the end of the day, it’s your child and you know what’s best. Food allergies are increasingly common and some research suggests it can actually be related to early introduction of too many foods. My mom has also stepped in before to try and “reintroduce” foods that put my son in the hospital. I don’t understand either how she doesn’t see that as putting him in danger but so many times people think well he will probably outgrow it or that wasn’t really what was wrong. I would try talking to her again. Calmly review with her what happened to your daughter in the past. Remind her that your daughter has restrictions on her diet because of this and you need her to respect that. Also tell her flat out that you are her mother and these are your decisions and if she can’t respect that then she can’t see her granddaughter alone.
I’m hoping that your husband is on your side with the issue. If so, it might help to have him talk to her as well so you don’t feel alone in your opinion. If he is not, have a talk with him as well.
Good luck.
I have a similar problem and have decided to call my Mother in Law tomorrow. People really make me sick. I have no clue as to why people (and it seems especially mother in laws) want to force foreign food into babies (or food that they are not ready for). Let her try to defend herself but know that it makes no sense and stick to your guns! My baby has colic and I refuse to introduce him to anything that could make him feel bad. Poor little Izzie. Give her a hug for me. And, tell your Mother in Law that she had her chance with her kid(s) and it is over now. This is what I plan to do tomorrow. Good luck!!
I was just talking about this with my friends with young babies last week. All of our mothers-in-law are obsessed with our babies starting solids, when they are all exclusively breast fed, and will be that way until at least 6 months. I think that mothers-in-law feel really useless when it comes to their grand children, espeically as if you need advice you are more likely to go to your own mother, and this is a way of doing something they think is important, ie making themselves important in the baby’s life. It also lessens the baby’s dependence on the mother. Let’s face it – they are jealous of you.
My best friend’s mother-in-law started feeding her grand child formula on the sly when my friend was at work, the end result being that my friend’s milk dried up because her baby was too full on formula. I don’t know how she ever forgave her. I think the answer is that you have to stipulate very firmly what you want your child to eat and NOT to eat when its not in your care, and if the inlaw disregards your explicit advice, then don’t leave the child with them again. Don’t fight with them or defend your decisions, just ask them to respect the fact that you are the parent, and what you say goes!
You are right about telling her that you are upset and that she will not watch the baby anymore. You should protect your baby from them. Don’t be embarrassed! If they ask to watch your daughter just remind them of what happened and tell them that is not acceptable. Just don’t say it with very much anger and you can still be “friends”:)
My in laws never watched my babies and they will never do it! My husband knows that and he agrees that our babies saety comes in first place.
I think you should “stick to your guns” so to speak. I went through the same thing with my in-laws. I flipped out, but guess what my daughter is 2 and a half and they still ask if it is OK to give her stuff. She is your child and it is up to you who watches her and what they give her.